The Early Bird Gets the Worm?

I spend Monday through Friday getting up around 5am, so whenever I get the chance on a weekend morning, I love to sleep in a bit. Who doesn’t love and look forward to that?

I’d been on Bumble for about a week. On Friday night I matched with a guy who was new to the area. He quickly tried to make the conversation sexual and while I tried to divert the subject, it seemed he could turn any subject quickly back into sex. I’ve found many guys actually have this talent and if I’m in the mood to laugh about it, I can even have an appreciation for this skill.

However, not long after matching I was just tired and decided it was time for bed. As I ended the conversation he filled in with the standard “I wish I was joining you”, “We could be having so much fun right now”, etc along with all fitting and applicable emojis.

The next morning I briefly wake up around 6 am to let my dogs out. I do a quick check on the phone and see he has sent me a message already this morning. I go back to bed and decide I’ll see what it says later.

I wake up a little after 8 and he’s since sent a couple more messages. I note to myself that this one might be needy. But I’m curious what couldn’t wait.

I open the app. The 5am message was simple, he wanted to know if I wanted him to send me a photo. I hadn’t replied at all. This was my mistake apparently. The next messages are 2 separate photos. I’d seen plenty of dick pics in my time in online dating, but this was a first for me.

The first photo was pretty standard. A guys hand around his hard dick with the photo taken from the standard downward angle. Besides noticing that he must also be a slob based on the amount of crap on his bedroom floor beneath him, it was nothing out of the usual.

The next photo on the other hand, took a few seconds to process. On the right side of the photo, and almost blurred into the background is a wrinkly, newly flacid dick. This guy must be a grower.

What disturbed me though, was what was on the left side of the photo. The part that was in focus. The part of the photo that I couldn’t take my eyes off of before confirming what it was I was looking at. He apparently had just “finished” and he was holding in his hand, unmistakably, a washcloth full of cum.

Reminding you that I had literally just woken up, no coffee yet, and was consciously trying to figure out if I was misinterpreting what I was seeing, I respond with the only word I can think of at that moment: “WOW”

He instantly responds:

Him: Oh yah babe. That’s what you do to me.

Me:

Him: You like that hun?

Me: I think I’m going to go take a shower

Him: Think about me while you are there

In less than 12 hours we went from “Hi” to dick pic and “finish”. Was this a new type of one-night stand? If so, was there consent? What made him think I’d want to see that when I clearly didn’t want to talk about sex with him the night before?

Throughout the rest of the weekend he continued to send messages always referring to me as “hun” and occasionally showing more aggression than was necessary.

I kept the photos long enough to tell some friends the story with the photos for proof. I felt others needed to witness my entertainment.

After that, delete.